Consider with me, what does it mean to you “to have heart”?
Is “having heart” about courage or spirit? Is it about being considerate and thoughtful of others, compassion? Is it about resilience or determination?
I am wondering if “having heart” is a balance of all three of these; courage, compassion, and resilience. Imagine having a sense of all three of these in your life, especially in the moments that are the most important to you.
Let’s look at how each of these qualities contribute to “having heart”.
Courage brings to mind thoughts of the hero and going beyond the common among us. Have you ever heard that courage is being afraid, and taking the action in spite of the fear? To remain steady, even when scared and following through with the action is a quality I would like to continue to expand in my life. At the same time, I believe courage is common among us. We seem to value when courage is displayed in others, maybe to a fault so that we forget that we too have the choice of courage at any moment.
How could you meet your desire for courage? What is one small action (positive and doable) you could take that would offer you a sense of courage?
Now about the fear, I don’t want to be stopped by fear and at the same time, I want to at least consider the feeling. My understanding of Nonviolent Communication developed by Marshall Rosenberg, any feeling is informing me of either a need unmet or met. With fear, I am guessing there is a need (something really important to me) not met. At the very least, I want to know what needs of mine would be met as well as the needs possibly not met by my taking (or not taking) a certain action. Then, with this understanding I can make a decision that will be in alignment with my values and what is most important to me.
Compassion has many meanings these days. On the level of consideration and thinking of others, possibly like the Golden Rule (treating others as you would like to be treated), is a good starting place for compassion to begin. When we think of others, our attention is with them. If we are able to consider what their experience might be, we can expand our attention into understanding or empathy. Understanding for someone else’s experience will (usually) be different than our personal experience, so understanding and empathy expands beyond the Golden Rule because it is considering someone else’s experience and desire separate from what we might want or experience in the same situation. Compassion, in my understanding, goes beyond attention, understanding and care, yet arises from these.
How could you meet your desire for consideration or compassion? What is one small action (positive and doable) you could take that would offer you a sense of these?
My daughter shows me resilience; falling down, brushing herself off and getting back in the game with renewed desire to be involved. I don’t always have the capacity to “get back in the game with a renewed desire to be involved”. It seems when I “fall down” it takes me a while to “lick my wounds.” Maybe as an adult I have gathered more baggage or pain that is triggered, so that it seems that more effort is necessary to “get back in the game.” This might be a wonderful opportunity to consider what prevents you from “jumping back into the game with a renewed desire to be involved?” I am guessing that unpacking this “baggage”, or to understand what is triggered within us, could lighten the load and allow each of us to live and experience life as we would enjoy more. It seems resilience is at the core of “having heart”.
What is one action (positive and doable) you could take that would offer you a sense of resilience?
In this moment I would define “having heart” as having the courage to remain steady with compassion and the resilience to continue returning to a renewed desire to be involved.
What does “having heart” mean to you?
Until next time,
Blessings, Love and Peace Matters
